Stop Holding Grudges, Try Forgiveness!

A Blog by: Michael Romano CARC/CRPA-P

4/25

As a SoberSuccess Coach, I've worked with many people who are new to recovery from addiction and alcoholism and one thing they all have in common is that they don't even realize they are living with resentments. I've found it to be really important to stress the importance of forgiveness and show them different ways to release their resentments. I carried around resentments for a long time and it really kept me back and stuck in a vicious cycle of anger, self-pity, and negative emotions. Whether it's forgiving others or forgiving ourselves, it's a crucial step towards achieving long-term sobriety and a healthier & happier life for us and our loved ones.

Forgiveness helps us let go of the past, which is really important when we are trying to live a positive, sober life. When we hold onto anger and grudges, it can be like carrying around a refrigerator on our shoulders. It's exhausting to say the least, unnecessary, and it can make it hard for us to move forward in our lives and reach our full potential. But when we forgive, we release ourselves from those negative emotions and the baggage that's holding us back. This can help us reduce stress and anxiety, which are common triggers for relapse, and we all know that relapse is not an option so why not just forgive?

Forgiveness also allows us to heal from emotional pain. When we're addicted to drugs or alcohol, we often use them to numb ourselves from emotional pain. But when we stop using, we're forced to confront those emotions head-on. Forgiveness helps us process and release those emotions in a healthy way, so we can heal and move on. This is really important because it helps us grow as individuals and become better people in recovery and life in general.

Another important reason why I found forgiveness is crucial in recovery is that it helps us rebuild relationships. I burned many bridges and destroyed many relationships over holding grudges. Addiction and alcoholism can damage our relationships with others, and holding onto anger and grudges can make it even harder to repair those relationships. But when we forgive, we can start to rebuild trust and reconnect with the people we care about. This can help us develop healthier relationships and create a more supportive network of friends and family.

Forgiveness is also really important for breaking the cycle of addiction. Addiction can create a vicious cycle of hurt and pain, both for ourselves and those around us. Forgiveness can help us break this cycle by allowing us to move past our past mistakes and focus on creating a better future. It also allows us to break free from the negative emotions and behaviors that can contribute to addiction.

Lastly, forgiveness helps us develop empathy and compassion. When we forgive others, we try to understand their perspective and see them as human beings with flaws and imperfections, just like us. And when we forgive ourselves, we learn to be kinder and more forgiving towards ourselves, which is really important for maintaining a healthy sense of self-worth.

On the other hand, holding onto anger and grudges can be really harmful to our recovery. When we're consumed by these negative emotions, we're more likely to relapse. It can also cause us to isolate ourselves from others, which can be dangerous in early recovery. That's why it's important to let go of those feelings and focus on the positive aspects of life, so we can stay motivated and engaged in our recovery journey.

Forgiveness is really important for recovery from addiction and alcoholism. Mostly forgiveness is for us, it doesn't mean we are saying it's OK to wrong us but it is saying "we accept it and are moving on". It helps us let go of the past, heal our emotional wounds, rebuild relationships, break the cycle of addiction, and develop empathy and compassion. By practicing forgiveness, we can create a brighter future for ourselves and those around us, and build a life in recovery that is fulfilling, meaningful, and free from the negative emotions and behaviors that can lead to addiction.

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